As the engine roar melted to a
kitten purr and our boat nuzzled up to the Caye Caulker pier, we
did a quick inventory check. Dancing palms, tick. Sun bleached
beach, tick. Island motto, "Go Slow", painted lazily on a
signpost stuck in the sand, tick. I gave my partner in crime a
private smile. This was the place. We'd escaped...for now.
Bobbing up and down against a tiny
Belizean island on the Caribbean Sea wasn't in the original
script. The plan had been to fly into Belize for a quick taste
of eco-adventure before slipping over the Guatemalan border. But
we'd got greedy, and four days later, we were still there with
our hands caught in the action jar. Jungle hikes, eco-tours,
Jaguar spotting, cave tubing, Mayan ruins and mountain bike
treks. Where would it end? The equatorial heat was on. We'd
needed a place to lay low for a couple of days. Somewhere a man
could find a secluded beach and lie back and think of England,
or anywhere else he'd rather not be. After making a few discreet
inquiries we knew there was only one place to hide, and only one
man powerful enough to help us get there. The man known only as,
"The Marine Terminal ticket booth guy".
So we paid for our boat passes
in small, unmarked bills, jumped aboard the first vessel bound
for the islands, and left the spoils of mainland adventure in
our wake. Not that the warm blue coastal waters were fooling us.
Home to more than one hundred and seventy islands, or cayes, and
the world's second largest barrier reef, it wouldn't be easy to
keep our hands off a bounty of aquatic fun that has tempted
travellers since Blackbeard and his Buccaneer posse cruised
these waters back in the 1600's. Yet, as we stood on this
unassuming wharf and watched our getaway vessel pull out of
dock, the captain turned to us with some re-assuring words of
advice, "Relax mon. You're on Caye Caulker time now".
If Gilligan had ever taken up
real estate development, Caye Caulker town would have been his
Big Apple. Dozing peacefully on this slip of an island, the
cluster of brightly painted ramshackle beach hideaways, deserted
beach lots, scattered fishing boats, palm trees, sand floor
restaurants, dive huts, and salty old sailors propping up bars
at 11am in the morning, makes for the perfect getaway haven.
The jewels in Caye Caulker's
crown are it minimalist pleasures. No international resorts,
flashy nightclubs, or peak hour traffic. Remember the motto? Go
slow. Our mission, and yes we did choose to accept it, was to
find a bungalow for as little as forty dollars per night on a
quiet stretch of squeaky white sand, treat our palates to an
array of seafood delights, and then debrief over a drink at a
beach bar watching the sun slip beneath a sheet of Caribbean
blue sea. This message will self-indulge in five seconds.
Before long, we'd slipped into
the "no shoes, no shirt, no problem" and "sarong, swimsuit,
smile" dress code, and immersed ourselves amongst the welcoming
band of eclectic castaways. It soon became clear that the local
brew of Creoles, Central Americans, and Europeans posed little
threat to our relaxation plans. However, we'd have to keep tabs
on the North American retirees swerving along the streets in
rickety old golf carts, sending dogs, children and loitering
tourists running for cover.
For three perfect days we hid
behind sunglasses, cocktail umbrellas and lobster menus,
wondering if maybe, just maybe, there would be no more calls to
action, and life really was a beach after all. Then one night,
whilst minding our own business over a couple of tall Panty
Rippers at Popeye's Bar and Restaurant, the bartender told us a
man had been in asking questions. "Did he know anyone who might
like to explore the reef?" "Had he seen any tourists dance so
badly to the reggae band they couldn't possibly show their faces
around the island?" The next morning, we went to see a man about
a snorkelling tour.
Whilst experienced divers
prefer the more exciting sites in the waters off Caye Ambergris,
the beautiful calm reefs of Caye Caulker offered the ideal
setting for first timer submariners like my nervous companion, a
Canadian mountain girl, much more at ease in a set of ski's than
a pair of flippers.
After the initial
disappointment of learning that this wasn't my chance to wear a
tight rubber body suit in public, the reef snorkelling trip
turned out to be a fantastic experience. We goggled and gawked
at the amazing array of fish, eels, and spectacular coral
formations. The highlight of the three-hour tour was Shark Ray
Alley, where Nurse sharks circled our wary group from a distance
before weaving in for a closer look, and the Southern Ray
stingrays slid their expansive wings over our bodies. Both
proved to be fairly harmless, if perhaps a little fresh for a
first date.
For the rest of the day hardly
a word was spoken. Mountain girl and I adjourned to our secluded
patch of waterfront paradise, soaked up the afternoon sun, and
flipped through back issues of Mexican celebrity gossip
magazines found discarded in our room - anything to keep our
minds off the fact that our days of sloth were numbered. Back at
the bungalow we hatched our plan. We were not giving up our life
of leisure that easily. We would go down partying. Caye
Ambergris awaited and I had a birthday to celebrate.
As the largest, most developed,
and most expensive of the Belizean islands, Caye Ambergris
caters well for the first class holiday seeker, with a range of
villas, luxury home stays and resorts to choose from. To prepare
for our last stand, we checked into the mysteriously named Sun
Breeze Beach Hotel, close to the main town of San Pedro, for
some pampering and creature comforts. The spacious rooms, resort
style swimming pool, Jacuzzi, massage studio, swanky outdoor
bar, and international flavoured restaurant were a world away
from the Gilliganism's of Caye Caulker, but at only USD125 a
night, my inner Thurston Howell the third was calling.
Pandered, pleasured, and fed in
ways that only money can buy, we climbed to the lookout over the
hotel bar. Slipping in the hammock, we witnessed one of the most
beautiful sunsets the Caribbean has to offer. Swinging back and
forth with a birthday cocktail in hand, I could truly appreciate
how delightfully far we were from anything resembling an office
cubicle. Contemplation over, I made my final charge into the
night. Crazy Canucks Bar, crazy Canadian in tow, we drank,
laughed and danced embarrassingly to reggae music until sunrise.
The following days we gorged on
water sports as fast as Caye Ambergris could dish them up. There
was diving amongst some of the world's most beautiful coral
reefs, sailing tours around the island, deep-sea fishing for
sailfish and barracuda, jet skiing and paragliding off the
sun-tickled beaches. Oh how we feasted!
Our hunger for aqua adventure
finally satiated, we wandered into town, plonked our behinds on
the nearest bikes for rent, and peddled to the far reaches of
the island. Crossing a small river by
man-pulling-rope-very-hard-powered ferry to the less populated
north island, we cycled along remote dirt tracks lined with
sweeping palm trees. Emerging from the bush onto the beach at
the edge of the lapping blue Caribbean, it was a leisurely ride
along long stretches of white squeaky sand to the "money" end of
town.
The north beach plays host to
luxurious resort bungalows and private beach villas. I pondered
ambitiously over the For Sale sign standing outside one
particularly hedonistic abode. Apparently, the former owner
wasn't happy about motoring his 80ft cruiser around all that
coral nonsense to moor outside his beach palace. Being the
entrepreneurial type, he'd used a few sticks of dynamite to
blast a neat little driveway straight through the reef.
Unfortunately, the government didn't see it that way and sent
him a fine big enough to clear the Belize national debt. He was
last seen paddling a canoe in the direction of Cuba.
A little further along we
stumbled across Captain Morgan's Retreat, setting of the
original Temptation Island show. As we stood outside the Mecca
of televised drama, so many touching memories came flooding
back. Amber and Troy whispering under a palm tree, probably
discussing the effects of global warming. Shawana ditching Gary
and confessing to Chad 'you had me at "are those things real?"'
At that moment, I couldn't help but appreciate the truly
important things in life. I turned to the ski bunny and told her
she had a smile so beautiful it could almost pass as
cosmetically enhanced.
Peddling across the beach
towards town for the last time before heading back to the
mainland, we waved goodbye to all the things we loved about the
cayes. The lazy palm trees, the ivory white sands, the aqua blue
waters, the hammocks swinging in the breeze, the friendly faces,
the plastic whale and dolphin fountain splashing water over
Jesus outside the pink Jehovah's Witness mansion...the what?
Anyway, for a couple of repeat adventure travel offenders, it
sure made a nice place for a day pass or two.
Some have said I spend too much
time living in a fantasy world, that I need to get a grip on
reality. Sometimes I think they're right. But then again,
they've probably never been to the Belizean cayes.
Simon Hillier runs
Get There,
a freelance writing service based in Sydney, Australia
In a career spanning 18 years,
Simon has worked in advertising, television production, travel,
sales and marketing, and e-commerce. In 2005, during a rare
moment of clarity, if not sanity, Simon leapt from the relative
safety of his office cubicle, into the murky waters of freelance
writing, where he now specializes in feature articles, travel
writing, copywriting, web content, ebooks and scriptwriting.
For more information visit his
website:
http://www.getthere.com.au