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Friday, May 5: The Scene
Walking around the city, I see at once why so many people had warned me
Rio would be a hard place to leave. I dont think they were referring to
the scenery, though. At least not the geographical kind.
Im here to get the real deal on another scene entirelybrothers who
travel to Rio for a sex hookup. My first night, my editor asks if Im
finding it fairly easy to get an angle on the story. UmI guess you
could say thatif you count being told what a big, strong, handsome man
you are by random beautiful women in restaurants, running into a former
neighbor from Brooklyn at a club where the ratio is always about five
women to one man, meeting Chris*, a bartender who offers to be my
unofficial translator, and being introduced to Nick, a 300-pound brother
from Chicago who moved here, bought real estate, and seems to know
almost every woman in the bar. If that qualifies as fairly easy, then
yes, the story is already in plain view.
In the clubs where brothers gather, the women make a point of saying how
much they like Black men. When I ask one why, she laughs and says,
Black men make strong love. Its clear the women know just how to
approach their consumer base.
Saturday, May 6: Opening Statements
The next woman to run the big-strong-handsome line on me is 5 feet10
inches tall with flawless skin and so fine I cant stop staring. Im in
a club that works like a supermarket. A series of women dance onstage
and you essentially pick the one you like. One minute Im drinking with
Chris, the bartender, and watching her, the next shes off the stage,
walking over and introducing herself. She says she saw me from onstage.
The thing is, she doesnt speak much English, so her introduction
involves kissing me on each cheek and grabbing my hand.
Intoxicating? Absolutely.
Im starting to think its not just sex that lures brothers here. Its
not just about how many women they sleep with or how responsive or
skilled the women are. Its also about being in a place where theyre
surrounded by limitless sexual options. Im told that men routinely pick
up two or three women a night, which the rate of exchange makes
affordable. Aint no brother in the States rolling to his crib with
three women unless Pharrell produced the first single on his album or he
just scored 41 points against the Lakers. Which is to say, this is not
about my being big or strong, but about the dollar being big and strong.
Now whether the brothers want to admit that is another thing entirely.
Sunday, May 7: Lessons in Etiquette
A brother in a wheelchair asks a woman at my table if shell take a
picture with him. Karla is reluctant at first and looks at me and Nick
(also at my table), as if she wants permission. Finally Nick, the
brother who moved here from Chicago, rolls his eyes, sighs and pulls out
two $50 notes and lays them on the table. Karla smiles, bounces up, goes
over and poses next to the brother in the wheelchair.
Nick explains there is a well-defined protocol here. When you walk into
a place, dozens of women stare at you. After you invite one to your
table, the others go back to pretending they never knew you existed. If
a woman accepts an invitation to your table, she isnt supposed to
respond to any other mans advances. Men fighting over a woman is bad
for business. And its all about business here.
Karla eventually makes her way back to my table, a little disconcerted
that I hadnt made an issue of her leaving to take the photo. She sits
down, sips her beer, and asks me with genuine concern, Dont you
understand how this works?
Monday, May 8: No Refunds
Met three brothers in their 20s from Atlanta who told me about the best
full-service bathhouses. The sex trade here works like a cell-phone
company. They have a plan for every income level. There are low-end
dives where women have hard living written in their eyes, and
middle-tier establishments where pretty women congregate in bars and
discos in pursuit of dollars and the men attached to them. The bathhouse
salons are the premium. The one the Atlantans recommend charges a $150
U.S. door fee.
The place features about a hundred very beautiful, nearly naked women.
The client is supposed to choose a guide who escorts him to the dance
floor, the swimming pool, the massage room or the private relaxation
rooms. While one such guide comes with the price of admission, other
guides try to talk you into hiring an additional woman.
One guy I talked to admitted to hiring a guide, getting too drunk to
perform, then trying to talk her into giving him a rebate. He might have
guessed they dont have money-back guarantees.
Tuesday, May 9: Buying the Fantasy
At the start of the week, a friend asked me what the women here offer
that sisters back home dont. I thought it was more about scale and ease
of access to sex than anything else. Well, I figured out something else
thats part of the equation: Its scale, ease and deference.
Ive heard the term GFE tossed around since Ive been here. Today
I learned it stands for girlfriend experience, meaning you can hire
absolutely stunning women who will cater to you, pamper you, act as a
guide, serve as a dinner companion, cook and clean for you (if youve
rented an apartment) and, unlike most prostitutes, kiss on the mouth and
spend the night.
Wednesday, May 10: Dreaming of Georgia
I should have factored mental fatigue into this assignment. I was being
cautious, giving myself a week just in case it took me a few days to
figure out how the scene works. But now Im tired. Having to
consistently suspend your moral sense so that you can keep people
talking to you is draining. Besides, I just saw a group of
10-to-12-year-old girls on the strip. Theyre glue addicts. They have
sex with tourists. They dont require condoms. Theres real poverty
here, and shit aint always pretty.
The lounge pianist was playing Georgia on My Mind when I walked into
my hotel. I thought, Brother, you have no idea.
Thursday, May 10: Game Is Sold, Not Told
Better you should live it than listen to it.
Adriana, 25, on why I would learn more about Rios appeal by sleeping
with her than by interviewing her
Friday, May 11: Thoughts From the Plane
Spoke to a cat last night who raved so much about his adventures in Rio
that he reminded me of those guys who watch too many movies and start
thinking the characters are real. It helps explain why the women werent
so difficult for me to resist (a question thats come at me from all
sides). Attractive as they are, the women role-play in a genre that I
dont particularly care for. Still, watching the movie being made was
fascinating.
Its worth noting that every brother I met talked about Rio as a chance
to live out the fantasy of having at your beck and call a beautiful
woman who never questions your judgment or threatens your authority.
Unfortunately, ideas like these arent isolated to Brazil. Thats why
Im thrilled that as I leave here Im heading straight to Washington,
D.C., to be a groomsman in my friends wedding. He absolutely adores the
sister hes marrying, and Im honored to stand up for him.
Ill consider it therapy.
William Jelani Cobb is an assistant professor of history at Spelman
College in Atlanta and a contributing writer to ESSENCE.
*All subjects names and identifying details have been changed. |